20 Types of Athletes at an Ironman or any Triathlon (try not to laugh)

A tri friend stumbled across this and I could not resist posting.  Not sure where it originates from, but it is a classic.

will see at an ironman rateyourburn triathlon

Ironmen/triathletes: is one of these you? Let us know below!

1. Guy who is pouring anything he can find on himself to try to wash away the urine that was recently released all over his shorts and legs.

iron man meme sterotype guy who just peed on himse

2. Guy who motions for the crowd to cheer as he approaches on his bike.

I LOVE this guy! His energy and enthusiasm epitomize the spirit of the Ironman. If you don’t cheer for him, you should be banned from spectating (IMO).

guy who likes noise makers ironman stereotypes mem

3. Alien hat guy.

Actually, about 30% of the bikers were wearing these helmets, but they never got old. They are soooo funny lookin’. If you think the drawing below is an exxageration, click here.

ironman i am an aerodynamic alien weird helmet ste

4. Took-as-many-sponges-as-humanly-possible guy.

This guy looks like a stripper tucking dollar bills anywhere they will possibly fit. (For those of you who are unfamiliar: race organizers sometimes hand out cold-water-soaked sponges at certain parts on the course as a way to help cool down the runners)

ironman guy who took every sponge he could possibl

5. Biker guy who throws his water bottle at the fans.

At first I was alarmed, thinking I had done something to offend this person. But then I realized he was just doing a good deed by chucking his empties in a race-spectated area for easier cleanup.

ironman guy who throws water bottle at you memes n

6. Guy running the Ironman with one fucking leg.

There is nothing, other than seeing my brother, that turns me into a psychotic crazy fan than seeing these so-called handicapped people doing things that 99% of “able-bodied” people will never do. I cheered so hard I actually tasted blood (can you rip a vocal cord? Is that possible?)

one leg iron man stereotypes memes rateyourburn pr

7. Biker guy wearing a yellow jersey. 

  1. First of all, he is not winning. Also, his name doesn’t rhyme with Shmance Barmstrong.
  2. Second of all, I’m making a point of this guy because he was the least friendly participant on the course (when I say “he” I am referring to every racer wearing a yellow jersey.) One yellow-jerseyed-man rode directly on the line that spectators are supposed to stand behind, and then shooed us away (a sweep of the hand, like “step back, plebes”) as if we were getting too close to greatness. Whyyy? BTW, there are studies showing that smiling enhances your mood and performance. All of these yellow jersey guys were just kind of …. jerks.*

*If you are friendly and happened to be wearing a yellow jersey, please bring back honor to your yellow-jerseyed peoples by commenting in the section below.

ironman guy wearing a yellow jersey stereotypes me

8. Guy who has turned himself into a human billboard for something comically unrelated to running, biking, or swimming.

Hey, If you run the race, you should wear whatever you feel like wearing! Just make sure there are big printed words so I can cheer you on (“YES! YOU’RE ENDING DIABETES! YAY! JEWS FOR JESUS! SALLY’S CLEANING SERVICE LOOKING GOOD!” If you print it, I will scream it.)

ironman human billboard stereotypes memes nyc tria

9. Guy who printed his name AS LARGE AS POSSIBLE on his uniform.

In doing so, he has announced to me that he enjoys being cheered for, and therefore I will probably pretend to know him…. “PETER oh my God is that really you???!! I have been waiting for you for MY WHOLE LIFE!!” (Yes. I actually do this. It usually goes over well. Usually.)

ironman guy with his name in big letters on his sh

10. NYPD and NYFD guys running with photos of lost friends.

So touching. There’s something about it that gives you that gutteral “proud to be a New Yorker” feeling every time.

ironman nypd nyfd in memory of firemen policemen s

11. The pro who’s curled up vomiting somewhere along course, but won’t take help because he doesn’t want to be disqualified.

There are rules about assisting the participants – if you help people in a certain way it can actually kick them out of the race. I’ve heard amazing stories about people crawling to the finish at Kona, refusing help from anyone.

ironman pro in fetal position on bench worried abo

12. Old guy.

How are you doing this? More importantly, how are you beating my brother?

ironman old guy stereotypes memes nyc triathalon r

13. Pro women.

I was BLOWN AWAY by these ladies. The top female competitors were incredibly close to the top men. They. Were. Killing. It. Major props to these rockstar fembots showing all of womankind that we are in it to win it. I got chills.

woman winner nyc ironman stereotypes memes rateyou
who run the world girls ironman triathalon rateyou

14. Guy who bought a nice new white spandex unitard and shaved all of his extremities.

Except his ass crack. Which you could see clearly through his white shorts.

ironman guy wearing white outfit who shaved everyt

15. Fat guy.

I go wild for the fat guy. He’s doing this Ironman just like the rest of them, but he’s sometimes carrying almost an entire additional person’s worth of weight on his frame. The epitome of “no excuses”. Super inspiring.

ironman fat guy stereotypes memes nyc triathalon r

16. Hottest chick I’ve ever seen.

This one is actually drawn directly after a woman who was running the race with a turquoise top (anyone who spectated will remember her, she was basically the picture of fitness). She had a nasty bod and her hair was in these cool braid things. She, too, was beating my brother. Girl was crushing it. Plus she always smiled at the fans.

girl with sickest body ever ironman triathalon ste

17. Guy who lost like 30 pounds training for the race (and was normal-size to begin with) and you barely recognize him when he runs by.

Ironman training = major calorie deficiency. Really hard to keep weight on.

guy who lost 40 pounds training for the ironman an

18. Guy who looks like he just got flour-bombed with sunscreen.

ironman guy who just got flourbombed with sunscree

19. Super triumphant guy.

His joy is infectious, especially as he crosses the finish.

I am an ironman happiest day of his life first tim

20. Superman.

AKA my brother. Because despite the fact that the “peeing on himself” guy may have been loosely entirely based off of him, or the fact that the old guy and the hot girl beat him or that he didn’t finish sub-11 hours like he wanted to, this guy continues to be my hero in every sense of the word. Being an ironman? Cool. Being a better big brother than any other big brother of time? Way cooler.*

*Would like to note that he is currently tied with my other big brother for the “best big brother of time” award.

super brother iron man race memes stereotypes rate
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About Flatlander Tri Coaching

Welcome to my page. My name is Heather Dall and I am a Certified Triathlon Coach located in Omaha, NE. I work out of Prairie Life Fitness (132nd location) and provide triathlon coaching, knowledge, experience, and expertise to those looking to get into triathlons to the seasoned veteran looking to improve performance. Along with being a triathlon coach and athlete, I also manage a local Trek Bicycle Store. There is nothing better than being able to be in a passion industry and share my love of the sport. I am an endurance junkie who got into competitive racing back in 2000. I started off racing mountain bikes, taking the podium numerous times. Then the kids came along and I took some time off to raise the squirts. Back in 2009 my friend suckered me into a mini tri and really the rest is history. I have been doing triathlons ever since, usually about 4-6 triathlons per season-primarily Olympic and X-Terra, plus 10K races, off-road runs, charity bike rides, and the occasional bike race. My background prior to triathlons, is tennis. I grew up playing on the courts in Northern California with the goal to play in college. I did accomplish my goal and was a walk-on at Creighton University. Long story short, while working part-time at Prairie Life Fitness in 2008, I was asked to start a tennis program for youth and adults. I still run the program and coach tennis year round. And with my connections at my gym, I had the opportunity to co-teach a 12 week triathlon training program for about 20 ladies spring 2011. They primarily trained for the Omaha Women’s Tri with a few going on to race later in the season. The group was a huge success and is the main reason I studied to become a triathlon coach. I love helping people to achieve their goals, make new strides, and spread my wealth of knowledge on to other like-minded individuals. Along with coaching, I am a distributor for Juice+ For those looking to add more fruits and veggies to their diet and make smarter nutrition choices, check out my site: http://heatherdall.juiceplus.com/

Posted on May 23, 2013, in motivation, Races and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. I agree with 4, those sponges are the greatest thing to happen on the run. I will have a hard time taking them now though; ‘looks like a stripper tucking dollar bills’. Too funny

  2. Oh my god. This is the best thing I have ever seen. Ever.

  3. Thanks for sharing. It is quite an entertaining post 🙂

  1. Pingback: 20 Types of Athletes at an Ironman or any Triathlon #try not to laugh# | Fat Girl to Ironman

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